angienano ([info]angienano) wrote,
@ 2007-11-08 00:03:00
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Chunk 6
Bother. I meant to write more tonight but I fell asleep right after dinner and woke up about fifteen minutes ago. I banged out a bit more, but then midnight hit. I finished the paragraph before posting, though, so you wouldn't have to remember half a sentence until tomorrow night. :)

My NaNoWriMo Progress

=============

[scene break]

Duke Pormano, supreme commander of the armies which had conquered Ruvor and the ranking Imperial in the place, threw excellent victory celebrations. To the man's credit, he'd had more practice at it than anyone else Arden knew of. The duke was a brilliant strategist and tactician both, and an inspiring leader.

Effective, Arden thought. That's what it sums up to -- the man gets the job done, whatever it is about him that lets him do it. That's why he's there, in that place, and he's welcome to it.

Arden was more comfortable when he could focus on one task at a time. Even if it were the sort of task where a mistake was likely to get him killed. Even if it were the sort of task where he occasionally did absolutely nothing wrong save being in the wrong place when some terrified little man finally collapsed under the weight of his fears and decided he needed to kill someone.

Even then, Arden preferred his own life and would happily kill anyone who suggested he might want to take Pormano's place.

Of course, that very attitude contributed quite a lot to his continued health. As his father's twenty-second son -- by a lawful wife rather than a slave, unlike quite a lot of his elder brothers, but not a particularly favored wife -- his chances of ever taking the throne were remote at best. Which hadn't stopped a number of low-ranking sons farther up the family tree from trying, mind. Any ruling family which lasted more than a generation had to be able to learn from history and the Molanos were particularly good at it. Arden was scrutinized constantly from his twelfth birthday on, under guard day and night, his contacts limited and his messages studied and censored.

He'd been strongly encouraged toward men from the first time his cock had hardened, and it'd been no hardship for him to go along with the encouragement. A man who'd lain with another man was banned from the imperial throne, and the public taking of a male lover was the traditional method by which double-digit imperial sons gracefully took themselves out of the competition. Arden had known from a young age that he wanted no part of the throne hunt and had been happy to bow out.

The Imperium, like commanding an array of armies, required not only attention to infinite details and the ability to put off sleep indefinitely, but also the ability to depend upon others -- many others, sometimes of unknown competency -- to perform vital tasks quickly and well. Having to rely on other people, on strangers, in order to fulfill his own tasks drove Arden distracted. He much preferred to rely only on himself, his own skills and his wit.

Such a man could never be a good ruler and well Arden knew it, so he was content with a lesser role in life. Whichever one of his brothers inherited from their father, he was welcome to it and Arden would happily pledge loyalty to him.

But Pormano did know how to arrange a victory celebration. Normally Arden would be drinking and enjoying himself along with everyone else -- even if he had had to borrow clothing fit to be seen in, since his own role in the war had precluded much in the way of baggage -- but that night he was just wishing they'd get on with it.

He was fairly sure he'd get his choice of slave. He might not be a general but he was a prince and the order of choosing was by rank and status. He knew he was going to have a fight on his hands, though, and not just physically. It was going to be grim for a while -- he hoped only for a while -- and he was impatient to get on with it.

Food followed drink and Arden, seated at the head table, picked at the offerings. Pormano had imported the best of everything into the seige-starved city, along with skilled cooks and bakers. Beef and mutton, boar and swan, eels and oysters, along with an array of spiced fruits and pickled vegetables passed by, accompanied by more wine. The slaves, all of whom had been starving for much longer than the length of an evening, looked on from the circumference of the room while their conquerors feasted. Arden had never cared about that before, nor even particularly thought about it, but this time he felt a pang of empathy for one particular slave.

By the time Pormano stood and began to speak, praising everyone in the room (the slaves didn't count) for their courage and might and guile, and thanking them all for their assistance in winning the recent war, Arden was tapping both feet under the table and thinking, All right, come on, get on with it....

Finally. Pormano, as the highest-ranked man there (purely circumstantial -- back home he'd defer to Arden and the five of his brothers who were present), chose first. He modestly declined to recite his deeds, which everyone there knew anyway, and chose a pair of beautiful women with flowing black hair and sharp, kitten faces. Since he was conducting the selection ritual himself, he couldn't take them immediately; he brought them up to kneel near his seat at the high table.

Next was Arden's second eldest brother, who'd commanded a thousand cavalry and defeated the last desperate sortie on the part of the city's defenders. Everyone listened to Pormano's recitation of his deeds, occasionally banging a fist on the table. Prince Veren also chose women; he was definitely within reach of the throne and hadn't been allowed any intimate contact with a man since his twelfth birthday. And damn little casual contact either. All his body servants were women, as well as his personal physician and surgeon.

Veren made his choices, one woman near his own age but still beautiful and with a knowing look in her eye, and another young enough to be his daughter. He knotted a scarf in his colors around the neck of the younger woman, then went over to the older. He unlaced his breeches, pushed her down and plunged into her, accompanied by a chorused roar of approval from around the room.



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[info]liriel1810
2007-11-08 08:16 am UTC (link)
Oh ouch! That's no fun for the slave! I really hope the men aren't claimed that way!

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[info]angienano
2007-11-08 08:18 am UTC (link)
Ummm.... [glances around for a window to escape out of]

Angie :/

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[info]liriel1810
2007-11-08 08:21 am UTC (link)
Oh, OUCH!! *feels badly for the male slaves and the one Arden has his eye on in particular*

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[info]angienano
2007-11-08 12:57 pm UTC (link)
It's not going to be fun no matter what, that's a given. :/ But Arden's a good guy and doesn't get off on making his partners hurt. Because of that if nothing else, the slave Arden has his eye on will be at least a bit better off than he'd have been with someone else. Now if Arden can just convince him of that. [wince]

Angie

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[info]alea_nano
2007-11-08 10:02 am UTC (link)
Ack! Yesterday was so bad that I didn't manage to even check my email, let alone write. So I am not going to read this (or yesterdays) until I have written 3k today. I need to be less far behind! *flail*

Also, I saw it said 'scene break', well done for sorting out the end of the previous one.

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[info]angienano
2007-11-08 10:12 am UTC (link)
I hardly did squat today too, so I know where you're coming from. :/ I slept too long this evening; I'm lucky I got a few hundred words written this afternoon.

We're well into Chapter Two now, and I'm looking forward to seeing what you think. Good luck with your own piece. :)

Angie

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[info]alea_nano
2007-11-08 12:12 pm UTC (link)
Okay, I have no self control.

Part of me hates you - this is so good that I want to eat it all up. It makes me feel all frustrated. I'm sure that to you this isn't as beautifully clear cut as it appears to me, but it seems like you must have the whole thing playing out smoothly and easily while I tangle myself in knots *g*

I love the switch in chapters, the introduction of the new characters (are they *new*?) and I'm busy speculating on how this ties into the old storyline and whether you are going to fill us in on how the city fell.

I'm probably completely on the wrong track, but was Halvic right about Roscha? That line about no baggage...

Yup, I'm probably barking completely up the wrong tree, but I just had this feeling I've maybe met these characters before.

Right, I am writing, honest.

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[info]angienano
2007-11-08 12:34 pm UTC (link)
I just had this feeling I've maybe met these characters before

Bing! Alea gets a cookie! :D

Yes, you've met three of the people in this room before.

The cultural bit is flowing pretty smoothly -- customs and attitudes and laws and all that -- but I'm still shaky on where the plot is going to go. I have the internal goal->conflict pretty firmly in my mind, even if in an embryonic state, but the external plot is quite a lot hazier. I'm going to have to work that out before I go much farther, although for the next chapter or two I think I can let the boys mostly worry about each other and their relative situation, with just a hint or two (all I have right now [laugh/flail]) about the larger problems in their world.

And yes, I'll give more info on how the city fell and what happened, at least basically, before too much longer, I think. [nod]

And yeah, I'm writing too. Really. [cough]

Angie

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[info]alea_nano
2007-11-08 12:40 pm UTC (link)
YAY that makes me really happy. I was secretly hoping a lot that I was right and that this wasn't just some other set of characters that Roscha and Luka were going to meet up with later (and am I also allowed to guess who the third one is...)

I've just worked out vaguely where I'm going with my plot in the short term. However, that meant making one of the "long term" plotlines into a short term one. Which is fine, I'm sure I'll come up with something to happen after that...

And I can see that, again in the relative short term, you can get quite a lot of mileage out of the change of situation of the characters before you have to worry about what's going to happen to them next. You are always welcome to email (if you'd rather not do it here!) if you want to throw ideas around.


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[info]angienano
2007-11-08 12:56 pm UTC (link)
Sure, speculate away. :) I'm sure your guess is correct, though; it's not like there are dozens of candidates, right? [wry smile]

Early on in a story it's easy to spawn new subplots or even new major plots. It's when you get farther into the story that you have to work with what you've got, or at least I think so. The main internal and external plots (which ideally are pretty firmly tied together) need to be presented to the reader very soon in the story, the definition of "soon" depending upon the length of the story but even with a novel, pushing it past Chapter Two is, well, pushing it IMO. I've planted some seeds already but I still have a boatload of wiggle room, so even if the readers don't get the full explanation of What's Going On until Chapter Three or Four, they'll be able to look back at those earlier seeds and go, "Aha!" and that's what's important.

And yes, I'll definitely shoot you an e-mail if I need a sounding board. :D You know to do the same, right?

Angie

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[info]alea_nano
2007-11-08 01:50 pm UTC (link)
I'm hoping that the next few sections are going to pull my various bits and pieces together. I've decided to jump Martha forward in time and consider her first bit as something of a prologue and then fill in the rest later. Otherwise the characters will take to long to meet and everything will remain a bit messy. I'm starting to realise how disjoint my ideas are/were and I'm trying to sort that out without sacrificing any of the initial things that I liked.

And thanks, I might well do that at some point in the future.

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[info]illuminated_sin
2007-11-11 11:09 am UTC (link)
Another chunk down! WOOHOO! I'm upset with you for what you wrote into this chapter though. :P Couldn't we have just alluded to it? :/ I always feel bad for the underdog, you know that. I hate to hear about people being hurt (against their will ;D). Bummer. I'll forgive you. But right now I'm :(

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[info]angienano
2007-11-11 11:15 am UTC (link)
I'm afraid there's more of it coming. [duck] This isn't a nice society and while Arden's doing the best he can, he doesn't have a lot to work with. And aside from that, he was raised in a world where this sort of thing was much more "normal" than we think of it. So things we think are horrible and criminal, to him they're just in poor taste or low class.

Besides, if I didn't give Luka a lot of reasons to despise Arden, the story would be really short. ;)

Angie

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[info]illuminated_sin
2007-11-11 11:18 am UTC (link)
Yeah, I figured. I understand why you're doing it, it's just ugly to watch. :(

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[info]foxrafer
2007-11-12 01:48 am UTC (link)
Just the idea that they don't just pick slaves to take back home with them but the ritual calls for them to rape them immediately at the meal is so barbaric. Definitely a great way to keep the demarcation between the good and bad guys very clear for me at least. I'm sure it's not intended to be so black and white but right now I have no gray. :-)

I really find the insight into the leadership and royalty very interesting. It's a great touch, especially the part of his brother who can't have even casual male contact, and adds a lot to how this culture is developing in my mind.

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[info]angienano
2007-11-12 05:51 am UTC (link)
There's quite a lot of grey here in my mind as I go through this, but yes, there are a lot of problematic features about this culture. I'm pulling characteristics from the classic and medieval world and while I'm making up most of the actual details, the attitudes and world views behind them are based on things people actually believed at one time or another. The idea is to set up a situation where certain things are just taken for granted or assumed to be normal, and then to work within those boundaries.

Arden is in the middle here, attitude-wise. He's not into hurting or humiliating other people for its own sake, or for fun, the way some people here are, but neither is he uncomfortable with the whole concept of slavery the way his friend Bayon is. He'll be thinking about this some over the course of the story, although I don't plan on reforming him clear up to modern sensibilities; that wouldn't be realistic, I don't think.

The concept of all people -- or even all men -- being morally equal and deserving of being treated alike or even thought of as having the same value, is a very modern one. Most cultures had a very strong demarcation line between "us" and "them" until relatively recently in history, and when they were fair or compassionate or generous as a culture, it usually only applied to the "us" portion of the population, which was pretty small. (And people who extended it to everyone in the world, like the Quakers, were thought to be pretty darned weird by everyone else.) My family, my clan, my tribe, my faith, my country -- these were common "us" groups, and anyone outside them could be treated with appalling brutality without anyone raising an eyebrow. Even now, a lot of people make these "us" and "them" distinctions in how people can or should be treated, without really thinking about it.

Why yes, I did write a paper on this in college -- how could you tell...? ;)

I came up with a history for just how it came to be that the Emperor can't have a male lover, and how that developed into the "no casual touching" thing; if it doesn't make it into the story, I'll probably end up posting it somewhere just for anyone who's interested. It's sort of eyerolly. :)

Angie

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